Woman Says Her Date ‘Shamed’ Her for How She Dressed on Their First Outing: ‘He Pulled a Face. A Face!’
A woman in jeans (stock image)
A woman is wondering if she’s “out of touch” with what to wear on dates after being “dress shamed” about her outfit on a recent first date.
Admitting that men have commented on her style choices ever since she started online dating, the woman in her mid-50s recalled one particular date on the U.K.-based forum Mumsnet and told readers to reply with “brutal honesty.”
“I like jeans and trousers. I wear good quality ones, on trend (or so my daughter tells me!), good tops, nice jackets,” she wrote, prefacing her date story with her sense of style. “I’m a trainers and Chelsea Boots fan, don’t do heels. Own one smart black dress, wore it for a funeral two years ago, and have a couple of summer ones that I pull out when it’s scorching.”
A man and a woman on a date (stock image)
She then described the March 5 first date at U.K. burger joint Bill’s.
“We ate burgers, I wore good jeans, a vintage Bella Freud jumper, some boots, hair and makeup effort was applied,” she said. “He said, ‘I thought we’d be dressing up.’ This has happened to me a fair bit since [online dating], never happened when I was younger and dressed the same.”
“Is it just men of this age who expect women to show up in high heels and skirts/dresses?” she continued, pondering his comment.
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This led to a “polite debate,” which resulted in him asking her what she would wear if they attended a wedding together.
“I replied that the last wedding I went to I wore a fitted waistcoat with nothing underneath, wide legged linen trousers, and lots of cool jewelry and got loads of compliments.” she remembered.
“He pulled a face. A face!!” she added, then asked, “Anyone else dress shamed on dates? Is it their age? Am I out of touch with what to wear?”
A woman taken aback on a date (stock image)
Her March 6 Mumsnet post quickly garnered passionate responses.
“Jeans and a top seems very suitable for a burger place.” one person replied, before offering a potential solution. “Are they showing up in a tux? You’re obviously choosing the same type of man if they’re coming out with similar comments. Perhaps it’s time to shake things up.”
Addressing people who wondered what her dating profile photo is, the original poster said she’s wearing jeans and a “boyfriend blazer” in it.
Another Mumsnet user shared that she dressed up for a date and still received unwarranted comments from her date.
“I’ve had the same but been told I’m overdressed — for wearing a midi or maxi dress and trainers, which is my standard attire.” she wrote. “Usually by blokes who turn up for a date looking like they’ve slept in a [dumpster] or on one occasion wearing a football shirt, shorts and flip-flops.”
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